Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
Randomize