i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
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