instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
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