my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
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