i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
