I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Randomize
