can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
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