Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
Randomize