Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(513): View more from Ohio

I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.

(419): View more from Ohio

I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.

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(815): View more from Illinois

have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?

(1-815): View more from Illinois

why can't you just be normal

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(715): View more from Wisconsin

I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.

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(973): View more from New Jersey

I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.

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(316): View more from Kansas

Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?

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