The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
Randomize