I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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