Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
the raccoons are back...
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