yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
Randomize
