Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
