She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
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