it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
I understand Curling. That high.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
Randomize
