i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
