Small penises have feelings too.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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