I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
it was like having sex with a tree stump
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
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