No awkward lesbian experiences without me
tell your sister to shave her snatch
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize
