My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
I see more hoeing in ur future
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