The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Randomize
