I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
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