You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize