I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
