The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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