so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
I need water and some morals
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize
