I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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