I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
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