you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
Randomize
