Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I wanna passion pit in your ass
Just realized our kids will one day call us old because we were around when texting came about. I'm sad.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
Everclear isn't food dammit
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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