It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
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