The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
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