just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
I think people are normalizing furries
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
