just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
