I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Randomize
