so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
