So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
Randomize
