That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
Last night the nurse at the ER told me that she wished all her drunk patients were like me. Then she commented on my socks...
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
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