and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
