the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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