it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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