spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
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