Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Randomize
