I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
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