Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
Randomize
