he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
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