What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
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