just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
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