i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Randomize
