Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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